Psychiatric Hospital

Dear readers,

I was detained and taken to a mental health hospital against my will under section 3 of the mental health act 1983. This was February 1st, 2022.

5 months later and I'm still here. I was admitted to a ward in Hailsham. Then became too unwell for the staff there to cope with. I kept self harming so was observed by a staff member every minute wherever I go on a 1:1 basis. But they eventually didnt have enough staff qualified to restrain me. 

They eventially had to transfer me to an acute hospital in Hastings where I live. 

It was ok but they then had a massive covid outbreak there! So me and a few others got transferred to other units. I ended up admitted to a unit in Eastbourne where my parents live.

Petrol and diesel prices have skyrocketed so my husband Ian could only visit once a week or 2. 

I just wanted to say that life in the psych ward is very difficult. You lose all your dignity and self respect. 

When acutely psychotic I've had to be physically restrained by 5 staff and my trousers and knickers pulled down for many rapid tranquillisations episodes for what are intramuscular injections of sedatives.

During the week days, you are randomly told that its your time with the consultant psychiatrist.Otherwise known as time for weekly ward review. Other Dr's need you for bloods. Other support staff need you for physical obs; blood pressure, oxygen saturation, heart beats, temperature, etc. 

Also, during the week there is much to do - they have therapy dog visits one day, baking another time, creative art group, pottery group, ladies pamper group where you get to use a foot spa, get hair washed with head massage, hair braided, nails, face mask, etc.

I have a treatment resistant form of psychosis (schizoaffective disorder) so I'm taking the drug of last resort, clozapine. Because of how potent it is, there is a huge list of side effects. I need to have blood tests done every week. 

However, the ward then had half infected with covid!! It was awful. They cordoned off half the ward. Half for positive, half for negatives. Our food was slid on a tray on the floor....I felt like I was in prison!! No leave (time granted off the ward with family or friends) granted to anyone. And no visitors whoever it is. The ward went on official lockdown. The nurses coming to our end hated it because they had to wear full PPE (personal protective equipmrnt) and it was really hot and they got annoyed quickly. I felt bad for them.

After a while, slowly things became easier. I had less emergency incidents where the alarm was pulled and I got restrained and sedated. Then eventually I had none. My meds kicked in and my psychosis fog started to clear. My mood also lifted. 

I was granted more leave off ward. So I spent the day over at my parents. And they took me out. We sat down to lunch and dinner together. Went to the park. Shopping. Beach BBQ. And Ian saw me on Saturdays. 

Then I was granted overnight leave. Tomorrow 6th July, I get 2 nights leave! Then a weekend leave is planned...and next week I will finally get discharged on Monday 11th July, 2022. Yipeeeeeeee!